In a Thousand Pieces

In the Old Testament God lost hope in humanity and sent a flood. I wonder how he hasn't lost hope in them again. The older I get the more I find I lose hope in the human race. The self-centered world that so many take hold of is disgusting. I find the lack of true love for each other is a dying trend. We excommunicate ourselves with technology, toys, and short-termed self-satisfaction. We submerge our lives into sports, politics, and our future life-partner. Me, me, me! The world screams of it day in and out. From facebook to twitter, constantly updating our every single thought and action as if others are supposed to be in awe of our own small lives.

I see "christians" everyday of my life. Whether it be at church, in town, or "liking" the latest christian page on facebook like "If you believe in God like this". Those same people I see slander their own family members with gossip and rejection. What would God rather see you do? Like some page, or try and mend a relationship with a blood relative.

The past several months I've tried to understand how to make my life truly represent what it should. I've done small things. For example, I don't get overly excited about sports or the latest craze. I don't want my excitement for worldly things to outshine my love for my Father in heaven.

What about this...what about the money I spend. Shouldn't more of my money go towards things that glorify God instead of another thing to add to all my stuff? Charities, missions, the poor.

The more I learn about myself and my need for people is really difficult to comprehend. I think there are some people in my life are wonderful, and I think they should know that. I feel like at times though, I don't feel that love from them. Quite honestly it hurts, I am hurt simply by not being told they care about me...extended time away from communication with these people makes me feel rejected, and no longer accepted by them. It's not fair to them but it is how I truly feel.

Disgusted by my own and others selfish lives. How can we sit by and watch as life goes on through the perpetual motions? Who is truly sold out to God, 100%...He doesn't want us halfway, he wants every fiber of our being to glorify Him.