In a Thousand Pieces

It has been almost an entire month since I have returned home from Colorado. If you followed my blog then you probably understand that much of my time spent out there was used in better understanding myself and the way in which I interact with people. When I got home after several days of rest I wanted to take on the idea of the changes that took place with my absence and in my return.

Being away I felt that my presence back home was missed by some; in particular my family. Now most of you that know me understand my struggle in understanding friends/friendships and this is where the experiment takes its foothold. While I was away I had a few friends occasionally contact me through phone calls, texts, or maybe facebook. The only problem was that it was so few and far between it almost felt somewhat unreal. No doubt I can understand the lack of communication with one's absence since it is difficult when you are away from those you want to see. So here I am back home seeing if those that I call a friend are truly just that.

I have been home for 28 days. That breaks down into four weeks. This is roughly the equivalent of one month.

The experiment: How long does it take for a friend to contact me since being home?*

*I do realize that many will see this as a shallow or cruel or something of a selfish nature. My intentions were merely to better understand those that I hold close to my heart and in turn understanding if that is a somewhat mutually held respect. You may also question the simple fact that I could just contact them first. Often I feel that I have been the friend that has to contact others first.


So whether or not you disagree with this idea it has been going on for the last 28 days.

So here is how it will all break down:
I will break down the series of weeks and the number of contacts I have received. Then explain to how I felt by the passing weeks. Lastly, my thoughts on what I learned from all of this.

Week 1 : One received contact. Received by text.

Week 2: No contacts made.

Week 3: Three received contacts. Two by text, one by phone call.

Week 4: Two contacts made. Both by text.


Now when I say I received a contact it was a deliberate "Hey, what's up" kind of thing. Typically followed by a "let's go do something". The list of contacts made do not include all social events participated in but simply by those that I expected that would contact me, there are a few exceptions also tied in with all that. I was surprised at the time it took some to contact me and more surprised by those that have yet to contact me. I can't say that this doesn't hurt, but at the same time it is what it is.

So there is no doubt I have a better understanding of the value I hold in some of the lives of these people. Some of which I am so truly grateful knowing them on a much deeper level more than ever. While some I am still unsure of where I stand in their lives.

You may wonder why I find it so important to know and understand my friendships. I think it is important. It is really that simple to me. Relationships between others truly can define you. I feel this can better your  understanding of your life and the role that you play in this world.

The social index that we all fall into is vital. At least from a Christian stand-point it should be. We need to understand ourselves and the people around us.


The man of many friends will prove himself a bad friend, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.